Metre monsters, a Kiwi clash and the NRL’s chief larrikins meet in Melbourne

Round 24 is upon us, and things are seriously firming up. And when we say ‘firming up’, we mean ‘descending into total chaos’. 

The NRL logjam is real and, really, we can only say who is definitely in – Penrith, Brisbane and the Warriors on 12 wins – and who is out, which is everyone south of the Dolphins, on eight for fewer wins.

Uncle Wayne’s battlers were the most recent to mathematically exit the scene last weekend, but they could wreak immediate revenge by doing the same to the Roosters in Saturday night’s headline clash at Allianz Stadium. Manly, too, are in…